A peculiar phenomenon occurs after you run a half marathon—people automatically assume that you will want to run a marathon. I was lying in a hotel room in the fetal position after my first half marathon when I first got asked if I was going to run a marathon. My response? “I’d rather die than run a marathon.” If you’re a half-marathoner who is sick and tired of people asking you when you’re going to run 26.2, here is an open letter for you to send to your friends, family members, co-workers and significant others.
Dear [Insert name of Friend(s), Family Member(s), Significant Other, Coworker(s), Random Stranger Whom I Told I Ran A Half Marathon To],
Well, I did it! I ran a half marathon! Words fail to describe what it was like to face my fears and my doubts while I ran 13.1 miles. I want to thank you for all of your support and encouragement (and jokes at my expense. I’m looking at you, [Insert name(s) of significant other, best friend, uncle, aunt, mom, dad, child]).
When I decided to run a half marathon, I really didn’t think I could do it and I know you weren’t sure either. I know this because you actually said that to me. Thanks for that. It took a lot of hard work—blood, sweat and tears—to cross that finish line. I now have to get something that I need to get off of my chest…
NO, I’M NOT GOING TO RUN A F*CKING MARATHON NOW!
Can we just celebrate the fact that I ran 13.1 miles? THAT WAS HARD! That wasn’t a warm-up. That was the main event! I’m not halfway there—I’m done! I’ve done it! So if you could all stop asking if I am going to run a marathon, that would be great. Ask me in a month when I’ve forgotten how badly that hurt. MAYBE, just MAYBE I’ll get crazy enough to want to run a marathon. (BUT PROBABLY NOT.)
Your Badass [Insert your name here]
There you go! No more awkward soul-crushing sighs followed by polite explanations about why you have no desire to run 26.2 miles. Running a marathon won’t make you any more or less of a runner than you already are. Remember, no one expects you to run a marathon but you can if you want to! Congratulations on your half marathon! Until next time, #RunSelfieRepeat.
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